10 posts tagged “tom”

This was a very wonderful Mother's Day! I was served breakfast in bed, complete with bloody mary, and then presented with presents! My favourite perfume, a dozen roses, a camera bag (it got returned but it was still wonderful that they thought of that), plus homemade presents from Bailey and Eddie. All the children signed their own names on the card.

Bailey had the idea of baking me a cake so Tom had to purchase all the necessary items and then help her make a chocolate cake and decorate it for me. She really got into giving me a wonderful day (breakfast in bed was her idea) and I owe a lot to both Tom and Bailey.

I had to go to Fort Myers today for a legal/mediation thing because Bailey's father is incapable of adult discussion and would rather spend thousands on an attorney than act mature and (maybe) pay off some of those mounting child support arrears with his hard-earned part-time minimum wage Office Maxx money. So we had the obvious discussions that could've happened on their own for free if his head had not been lodged up his ass, changed the Agreement a little to compensate for any future incidents of his head/ass lodging, and moved on with our lives.

Anyway, I took some time to walk around downtown amidst the continued [re]construction. It brought back some memories.

This is where I used to work. Technically, I worked on the other side of this historical building, in a building that was built attached to it for the offices of the Clerk of Courts. As a minutes secretary, I would record the minutes of all Lee County Commissioner meetings, which would take place in this historical building.

The French Connection is a little restaurant where Tom and I had our first lunch date. It was also our first date that wasn't scheduled around the convenience of our evening college classes. We'd actually made time for each other. I didn't eat much because I was nervous. He ate fine. This is a popular spot for downtown employees to get a nice, sit-down lunch in a mid-range price that can offer a bit of quiet.

I parked in the Main Street Parking Garage "borrowing" Tom's city parking card and descended down this steep stairwell every morning. This is a couple blocks from the old Courthouse, where I worked, and is almost right across the street from the big antique shop that you can get lost in for hours at a time.

Tom and I had a lot of dinner dates, and a few lunches, at Ichibans Sushi Restaurant off of Dean St. They also deliver to the downtown area. As you walk down Dean Street, you're greeted by this open furnished courtyard. There's also a a bakery here.

The statues of Ford, Edison and Firestone engaged in casual conversation are at the entrance of Centennial Park along the Caloosahatchee River. It was around these gentlemen that Tom and I had our commitment discussion. We had scheduled to meet each other here for "a very important talk" and he arrived before me. I remember pulling into a front space and seeing him seated in one of the surrounding benches looking very nervous. Fortunately, our discussion was very different than what he had feared it would be.

The shelter area of this park is where the local drum circle meets every Saturday evening.

The Harborside Event Center is where Tom went on a lunch break during a wedding expo to find a vendor for my engagement ring... and did. I don't know if I'm supposed to know that or not, but I do.

I took more images than merely those that triggered memories, and you can see them in the Fort Myers, FL flickr set.

Both my daughter and my husband are home so life can resume.

Tom now has an updated MCSE, the details of which he could explain more than I could. I'm very proud of him.

I retook station shots of CCFEMS 5, 6, and 7 and PGFD 2 and 3. Tomorrow, I have an attorney appointment after which I'll be able to redo CCFEMS 16, PGFD 1, and all the CCFEMS that are in El Jobean and over that bridge into Englewood. I also have to retake CCFEMS 2 because I just don't like what I have and I'm not selling something I can't put my name on.

At some point, I need to go to Myakkahatchee Creek Nature Park to repair a chewed up geocache that we'd adopted. Some animal gnawed on it a week or so after we adopted it to prevent it from getting archived. I'd scheduled that repair for this week but that was before the hospital gig came up.

I also need to remove some of my waymarks from the directory until I can update coordinates and photos. Many of the "Art About Town" exhibits that were scattered throughout downtown Punta Gorda have been relocated to a park across from Fisherman's Village. This effectively outdates all the information that I have for those waymarks.

 

This is Punta Gorda Fire Department Station 3. My photoshop skills have fallen short for this one. This was the shot I really wanted to sell for PGFD 3 but I cannot fix the hedges to their proper "PGFD" look. I'm really aggravated about it.

 

CCFEMS 7 always photographs beautifully. It is the station by the Punta Gorda Airport. This is the typical floorplan that's becoming the standard for all new CCFEMS stations, with very little variation from one to another; but, for some reason, Station 7 is always more photogenic. Lucky 7. Once I got done cleaning up the shot, I was very happy with it.

Tomorrow is, of course, my birthday. I am turning 29 (again).

Today was just photoshop work. I reshot CCFEMS Station 2 but I don't like any of the shots and will go back again when I can get people to move their cars out of the way. There was a [presuming] false alarm at the high school, which had Engine 1, Truck 2 and a Rescue there and gone in the time it took me to pick up the kids from their school. There was some fire off towards Deep Creek this evening but Deep Creek is such a maze that I've learned my lesson trying to chase smoke in that place.

My husband is scheduled to return from this MCSE boot camp on Sunday afternoon and I'm greatly looking forward to him back home.

Tommy has transitioned himself to regular cups, which means no more sippy cups and no more demands for drinks at bedtime. Since I always dread having to go through the transitional period of getting a child to stop a behavior they don't want to stop, having him initiate all of it and accept what comes along with it is a tremendous relief! He's still very diligent with brushing his teeth and washing his hands. He will do anything that feels grown up.

This is a photo for a waymark I posted this evening in the Church of the Nazarene category. Taking the church pictures was the only time I used my digital camera today. The rest of the time, I was preoccupied with black & white 35mm experimenting. I'd share it with you, but I have to use the whole roll, then drop it off for developing, then wait for it to be developed, then pick it up, then scan it, and then upload it. Is "outdated" technology worth it?

The rotten experience that I've had thanks to a couple of waymarkers (one in particular) in trying to manage the first category I created has really soured my spirits on waymarking. It takes a few deep breaths to remember why I waymark - going back to the very mission statement I wrote just a little while ago - and remember that there are good people willing to have the argument for me, even if just for the sake of plain ol' good sense, and I don't have to pull my hair out over a spoiled brat's noise! My category is fine.

Bailey and Eddie have Field Day tomorrow, Eddie has a Field Trip on Wednesday, Michael has Field Day on Thursday, and then there's Picture Day for all three on Friday. It's a big day. I won't be buying the pictures this year... not when I can do my own at a much lower cost.

Bailey outgrew her old sneakers and needed a new pair. My baby girl is in a girls size 13. I don't believe it!

Dinner this evening was meatloaf and french fries. The kids loved it but it was too greasy for me and has hurt my tummy. I've felt better since taking a nice, long hot bath... the universal cure for many aches! I spoke with Tom, who has been managing very well at boot camp. I'm going to relax in bed and read.

Tom didn't get paid today. Tomorrow is a holiday. This means that when my husband's boss gets off his fatcat ass to actually pay his employees, we will have the money he earned on January 2nd. They never fail to not pay him for the days he's out sick from injuries gotten at work. Can't manage to pay people on time, though, even if it fucks up their holiday.

I had planned to spend the day baking, but Bailey, Tommy and I were invited to have lunch with Tom in Fort Myers, so we did. After taking Tom back to work, we went to Imaginarium since we were in town. This was Bailey's fourth or fifth visit and Tommy's first. The thunderstorm chamber scared Tommy a little (fun to watch from the outside but scary to be inside), but they both had fun with the Petting Pool and the interactive games. They each picked a fun bouncy ball from the giftshop and we came back home.

Now, I'm a bit pressed for time to start dinner (with no baked goods) but it's all fine. Tonight we're having barbecue chicken (with onions and garlic), mashed potatoes, and country-style baked beans. So, I'm going to go do that now. Here's a few more pictures from the Imaginarium:

 

Recently, we unpacked a box full of Tom's firefighting memoriabilia. There was little recovered from the Charlotte County Airport, where Tom was storing many of his things in his father's hanger, after Hurricane Charley rolled through Punta Gorda. What we recovered, we repacked and set aside until we could organise it. On Saturday, I finally got it on the walls and shelves in the masterbedroom. Some of the photos were scanned immediately to capture them before they faded. I don't know who took any of these photos. Here is a few:

 

Tom in gear next to the fire engine at the Punta Gorda Fire Department. He was a nozzle man, which is the position that sprays the water on the fire. This is the vehicle that he spent the majority of his work with.

 

Tom grappoling from the extended ladder of the ladder truck in the Punta Gorda Fire Department. This was during a special training session where firefighters climbed the ladder to the top and grappoled down. I know for a time he was assigned on the ladder truck but I don't know if this was during that time. This was a photo that I had to print at a larger size to put on the wall so I spent a good amount of time repairing the damage on the photograph so it was suitable to display. It came out rather well but I did not save my work, preferring to keep the raw scan on file.

 

A bit earlier, this is Tom's first firefighting gig, at Harbor Heights Fire Department before the department was absorbed into the Charlotte County Fire District. Tom is seated on the stairs in the middle and is surrounded by his crew. The gentleman below was his roommate and long-time friend. Recently, they got back in touch via Geocaching.

My husband was injured at work on Tuesday and has been home in pain ever since. It's not the expected injury. His spine and his hips are perfectly fine, which makes sense because he's done his job using all the precautions he was taught. So, this is a new muscle-related condition that happened even with all his precautions. Since we don't have insurance until he's three months into the job, he wanted to wait to see if it would go away overnight.

On Wednesday, I took him to Fawcett Memorial Hospital's Emergency Room and his father paid the bill, after Peace River Medical Center refused to treat him for lack of insurance. He received an injection for pain and a couple prescriptions: a muscle relaxer and vicodin. After paying for those medications out-of-pocket, he settled in to let the medications help him out and get past this thing.

Now it's Friday and he's still too cramped to sit or walk for any duration of time, even with the prescription-strength muscle relaxer and prescription-strength pain killer. Three days out of work and there's been no compromise on either his or his supervisor's part to give him any remote jobs. I don't understand that. He can still work from his back on his laptop. He just can't move! I've been recommending that he call New Hope Natural Healing Center, where his mother goes for massages and acupuncture. It was the chiropractor at this place that got Tom a standing MRI and identified his herniated discs in 2005, before they knew his hips were broken. Since this is a muscle problem, I think acupuncture will resolve the problem. His parents might help us out with that expense.

I really miss having health insurance.

 

EDIT: The day has just happened to work to where Cheech will be able to treat him (acupuncture) at 3:30pm.

You know, I'm not an indoors person. Sometimes I like to crash but I really prefer to be out and doing things. I've been such a homebody for the past several years because of men. I followed what they wanted to do. I'm not excusing my inactivity but pointing out what a stupid reason I had. Tom's pain and Tim's laziness. These past few days have been really nice. Tom still has pain but it's at a point that he can handle and he's never been an indoors person before this pain. It's just nice for both of us to get back to ourselves and share activities.

I felt concerned when he started talking about how he's used to going off on his own. Was this because his previous girlfriends/wives didn't enjoy the outdoors? While I don't think we need to do everything together, I see no reason for him to be gone often. I suspect that he would be bothered if I disappeared every weekend to do things that we could be doing together. As it is, he's more than welcome to grab all the park & grab caches he wants to without me... on the way to work, during lunch, on the way home, after having a quick drink with his staff, etc etc etc, whatever. If he wants to hunt, yeah I won't go with. Because of children, we have to ghosthunt separately. But he's not going to be disappearing like he did with Tammy and Cindy! I won't have it! I like the beach. I like camping. I like kayaking. I need to hike. I'm into all of it.

I certainly can't do these things on my own, thanks to a few startling experiences that have frightened me enough to not bother trying again. I'm not adverse to gathering fellow female friends who enjoy the outdoors more than expensive lunches or kid play dates, but that takes time. I don't think they should be an absolute replacement to having experiences with my husband. And while I do support him having friends and want him to go out with friends, I don't believe they should be an absolute replacement for me.

There is a balance here.

I think part of what works best for us was how much we have in common and enjoy each other's company for romance and friendship. While dating, we could be casual and comfortable around each other without constantly playing the game and flirtatiously performing. This allowed us to genuinely enjoy what we were doing and enjoy each other's company. It also allowed us to get to know each other as friends and as lovers. We weren't busy pretending to be people we weren't or expecting the other to be someone they're not. That seems so simple but how often does that happen in relationships?

I am concerned that these years that Tom's been disabled, we've mistakenly reclassified our relationship to the home. Our relationship doesn't belong on the couch or in front of the television!  Our relationship belongs on the Myakka River in a tandem kayaking with him steering so I can get a good close-up photograph of a large gator. Our relationship belongs on the sands on a beachside motel with sand between our toes watching the brisk aqua blue waves of the Gulf move the boats around. Our relationship belongs bushwacking through miles of preserve to find a tupperware container full of crap so we can sign a team name in a notebook.

Now with a minivan, there's nothing to stop our relationship from resuming in its natural habitat, and raising our children in that world.